I’m finally ready to share my story from the last couple of years, both because I believe in the power of vulnerability and because I hope that something in my journey might support you on your own. For those of you who knew me as a public-facing HSP therapist, you may have noticed I suddenly went quiet. Now, I want to tell you why.
Let’s go back to the end of 2021. I had recently launched a live round of my new boundaries program for Highly Sensitive People (HSPs), and while the launch had its bumps, it was thrilling to guide a group through something I had worked so hard to create. On the outside, everything seemed to be going well, but on the inside, I knew something was very wrong.
Recognizing the Signs of Burnout
I began noticing changes in myself over the course of 3-4 months:
- I was deeply fatigued.
- I felt emotionally heavy; some days, I felt almost depressed.
- Random sinus and allergy symptoms made me feel like I had the flu.
- It was as though someone had turned off my power switch, and my inner “juice” was just… gone.
At first, I pushed harder, convinced I could outwork the exhaustion by sticking to my to-do list, keeping my workout intensity up, and meeting every deadline. If you’ve experienced trauma, you might recognize this response to stress—fighting to stay in control, even as your body waves the white flag.
Despite my efforts, nothing worked. Even when I tried resting, my fatigue deepened. It felt like I was stuck in quicksand, the harder I pushed, the more I sank.
After my bloodwork came back normal and my primary care doctor had no further suggestions, I sought out a gifted integrative doctor. I’ll never forget her saying, “You’re aging at an accelerated rate. It’s as though you’re driving around with a tiger in the backseat.”
I was horrified, but at the same time, relieved. Someone had finally validated my experience.
Coming to Terms with My Reality
It was time to be honest with myself and start naming how I had gotten to this point.
- Overwork Without Alignment
From 2018-2021, I created, launched, and ran two programs for my business, Intuitive Warrior. They were fulfilling, yes, but I was operating in a way that didn’t honor how I’m wired as an HSP. It’s humbling to admit, especially since my life’s work is about validating the unique needs of sensitive individuals. Yet, there was a blind spot: I couldn’t see that I was pushing myself too hard, compromising my own well-being. - Unprocessed Grief
In 2016, I experienced a significant loss that I hadn’t fully grieved. It’s remarkable how those unresolved emotions linger in our bodies and minds, waiting for the right moment to be addressed. Overworking had been my way of escaping the grief that I hadn’t allowed myself to process. - Empathic Overload During the Pandemic
Like many empaths, I fell into the trap of carrying the emotional weight of the world during the pandemic. Without even realizing it, I began absorbing collective fear and uncertainty, compounding my own emotional exhaustion. - A Nervous System in Overdrive
My nervous system had never fully learned how to rest. After four decades of running in “go-go-go” mode, the toll was becoming undeniable. Even though I had grown significantly more grounded than I was 10-15 years ago, a part of me was still stuck in survival mode.
This realization marked a turning point in my life. While I now understood the reasons behind my burnout, I had to help my body, heart, and mind recover.
The Slow Journey to Recovery
Over the next 6-9 months, I made drastic changes to my life. I began prioritizing rest, taking countless naps, and shedding tears I had been holding back for years. I slowed down, far more than I ever had before. It was excruciating, but necessary.
One of the hardest decisions was letting go of my amazing team and shifting my focus solely to 1-on-1 client work. I paused my group programs, shelved plans for a podcast and online community, and even stopped sending emails to my audience. Each step felt terrifying, like I was standing on the edge of a precipice, unsure if I would fall or soar.
Looking back, I can see that I experienced both. The plunge into the unknown was inevitable, but so was the growth that followed.
Lessons from My Dark Night of the Soul
Now, on the other side of that harrowing journey, here are some of the key lessons I’ve taken away:
- Chronic Fight-or-Flight Responses Can Linger
If you grew up in an environment that felt unsafe (whether physically or emotionally), you may still be operating in fight-or-flight mode without realizing it. Even those of us who have done significant self-growth work can have this nervous system pattern running quietly in the background. - Resting Can Feel Scary
For those who’ve spent a lifetime in survival mode, dropping into deep rest for the first time can feel terrifying. It’s vulnerable and uncomfortable, but necessary for healing. - Letting Go of Identities is Liberating
It’s incredibly hard to let go of identities we’ve clung to for years—whether it’s the identity of a high achiever or someone who “gets through anything.” But in letting go, we make space for more authentic, aligned versions of ourselves to emerge. - Energetic Hygiene is Non-Negotiable for HSPs
We, as highly sensitive people, truly need energetic practices to thrive. It’s not an option; it’s essential. - Self-Acceptance is a Lifelong Journey
Even when we think we’ve fully accepted our sensitivity or neurodivergence, there may be hidden ways we’re still denying our true nature. This journey is ongoing, and that’s okay. We are constantly evolving into truer versions of ourselves.
Moving Forward: Embracing Your True Nature
If you resonate with my story, I encourage you to reflect or journal on two questions:
- Does your nervous system struggle to fully rest?
- Are there areas where you might be subtly denying your true nature?
I hope that in sharing my story, you feel encouraged and validated on your own. The past few years have been intense for nearly everyone I know, and if you’re navigating your own dark night of the soul, know that you’re not alone.
If you’re ready to stop pushing through and want to learn how to truly honor your sensitivity, I invite you to check out my free workshop, Break Free from Empathy Overload. It’s specifically designed to help highly sensitive people navigate this challenge and start creating more emotional space for themselves.
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